By Hotels: the land of tiny soaps, weirdly small decorative pillows, and a mini-fridge that somehow charges $10 for a bottle of water. They’re great for comfort, but not so great for your bank account.
Sure, I’d love to stay somewhere luxurious where the towels feel like clouds and the breakfast isn’t just sad, stale bagels. But spending hundreds of dollars for a place I’ll only be in for a few hours? No thanks.
So, if you want a decent hotel without financially ruining yourself, here’s how to book one like a cheap genius.
Step 1: Don’t Be a Fool—Just Use Google
Want to waste your life comparing prices on 20 different hotel websites? No? Then just go to Google.
- Type “[City Name] hotels” in Google.
- Click “View Hotels.”
- Filter by lowest price, location, or whatever else makes you feel in control.
- Pick a hotel that doesn’t look like a crime scene.
- Click “View Prices” to see which booking site is cheapest.
Boom. You just saved yourself an hour of clicking between a million tabs. Welcome to efficiency.
Step 2: Call the Hotel Like It’s 1999
Hotels hate paying commission to booking sites. This means that if you call them directly and say, “Hey, I found your room for $X online. Can you match it?” they usually will.
Bonus: Big hotel chains only give you loyalty points when you book directly. So if you’re the kind of person who dreams of free nights at a Hilton, call them and book direct.
Step 3: Use the “Old People” Discount (No ID Required)
Good news: Anyone can join AARP. Yes, the American Association of Retired Persons. No, you don’t actually have to be retired.
For $12 a year, you get discounts on hotels, car rentals, and flights—because society assumes that old people won’t tolerate getting ripped off. Be like them.
Other membership discounts to check: AAA, student discounts, military discounts, or whatever random club you were forced into in college.
Step 4: Cashback = Free Money (Kind Of)
Booking through Expedia, Hotels.com, or Booking.com? First, go through Rakuten or Mr. Rebates.
These sites literally give you 1-10% back just for clicking through them first. It’s money for doing nothing.
And if you’re not using cashback sites, what are you even doing with your life?
Step 5: Last-Minute? Use HotelTonight
Hotels hate empty rooms. At around 4 PM, they start slashing prices to fill them.
- Download HotelTonight
- Wait until the last second (because you love living on the edge)
- Book a room for up to 50% off
Sure, there’s a little risk involved—like maybe getting stuck in a sketchy part of town—but hey, adventure!
Step 6: Book a “Mystery Hotel” (a.k.a. Gamble With Your Lodging)
If you’re feeling brave (or just don’t care where you sleep), use:
- Priceline Express Deals
- Hotwire Hot Rates
You won’t know exactly which hotel you’re getting, but you’ll see the general location, star rating, and amenities. Think of it as Hotel Roulette—but with real money.
It’s usually 30-60% off the normal price. Worth it? Maybe.
Step 7: Sign Up for Booking.com & Hotels.com Loyalty Programs
These websites bribe you to keep using them.
- Hotels.com: Stay 10 nights, get 1 free.
- Booking.com: Members get 10-20% off instantly.
It’s not exactly a free penthouse, but hey, small victories.
Step 8: Pay With Discounted Gift Cards
Yes, you can buy hotel gift cards at a discount.
- Visit Giftcardgranny.com or other discount sites.
- Buy hotel gift cards for 5-20% less than face value.
- Use them like cash to book your stay.
It’s basically hacking the system, and who doesn’t love that?
Step 9: Buy Someone Else’s Hotel Room (Seriously, This Is a Thing)
Sometimes people book non-refundable rooms but can’t go. So instead of crying over lost money, they sell their reservation on Roomer.
You swoop in, grab the reservation at a discount, and they get some of their money back. Everyone wins.
Final Thought: Don’t Overthink It
Unlike flights, hotel prices don’t dramatically fluctuate. You’re not going to find a “mystery Tuesday sale” where a $300 room suddenly becomes $50.
Spend 30 minutes, follow these tips, book your hotel, and move on with your life. Because you’re here to travel, not to obsess over saving $2.
Now go forth and sleep somewhere nice without going broke. 🚀